Why, why why?

I take non-religious funerals. Among the worst are those where a loved family member has died far too young in a car accident. Sometimes the feelings of loss and grief are made worse by being mixed with anger over an irresponsible act that has caused this horrible experience.

Sometimes the feelings are very strong, and stay with me long after the funeral. The sympathy for a grieving mother, wife or sister can be overwhelming. And the following day I get into my car and drive.

A few days ago I was in that situation. I drove up the road to take the dog for a walk, travelling on a winding wet road at or about the 60 mph speed limit, and some crazy kid came roaring up behind me as I went into a right hand bend. He raced past round the bend on the wrong side of the road, and gesticulated at me when he got in front. There was no way he could have had any idea if there was traffic approaching. The road is busy, used by heavy lorries from an industrial park and a land-fill site.

He was lucky. But another time and I'll be phoning his mum to make an appointment to discuss his funeral arrangements. His showing off will have become his family's devastation.

Why do people do this? The place I walk the dog has its main exit onto a single carriageway road. Just up the road is a sharp bend, and a sign indicating the park entrance. As you pull out of the park and join the road it is a common experience that someone comes round the bend at a lick and somehow manages to break when they see your accelerating but still slow moving rear end. Everyone knows the park entrance is there, so why take the risk?

A work colleague was in an accident - he'd been hit when he tried to drive across two lanes of fast traffic. He said "I thought there was time". That's it - you think it's okay (if you think at all) but you're wrong. Why put your life on an error-prone judgement? Why not just wait until it is certainly safe?

I have seen so much madness, so many foolish, irresponsible risks, lately. I get paid for taking funerals, but I'd still much rather not have to take them for young men who have brought about their own early death. Sitting with their wives or families talking about them and their funeral is gut-wrenching.